Category: News

February 3, 2018
DFI Blog - Save the Date - Alumni Night 2018

The Denver Family Institute is proud to announce it’s annual, Spring Alumni Party. This year we will be holding our gathering at the Redline Art Gallery in Denver’s LoDo neighborhood. You can find the Redline Art Gallery at 2350 Arapahoe St, Denver, CO 80205, or by clicking here.

At this year’s DFI Alumni Night, the Denver Family Institute will be presenting awards for the Marriage and Family Therapist of the Year, the Alumni of the Year, and this year’s Legacy Award Recipient!

At the event we will also be celebrating the graduation and success of the Denver Family Institute Class of 2017. So come on out and join us on February 10, 2018, as we celebrate last year’s accomplishments and look forward to the year ahead!

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October 26, 2017
DFI Blog - Clues to Making Your Office Work for You and Your Clients

No one prepared most Clinicians for the rigors of private practice. There surely were no classes discussing chairs, love seats, couches, art, plants and lighting, waiting room music, magazines, sound proofing and lighting. That’s what I, in all humbleness, want to offer in this post. These are my views after 50 years of being a therapist and sometime client. I did visit Freud’s office in Vienna and while I loved seeing it I disliked it to my very core (see photo).

Designing the Waiting Room

First, a waiting room should be inviting and give a good first impression. Make sure it is really sound proof. If clients can hear what’s going on in another office, how secure can they feel about confidentiality? Magazines should be kept current. Music helps if it’s chosen wisely and softly. Radio is not preferred.

Posted in News, Therapists Tips by admin | Tags: , ,
April 30, 2017
DFI Blog - Life Advice Catch People Doing Something Right

One of the oldest and wisest sayings I’ve learned in my career is, “Catch people doing something right, and then acknowledge it”. At first, I thought this phrase was about changing other people. The idea to me was to encourage the best in children, family friends and employees. I continue to see that this works in all aspects of life. It is a highly effective technique.

What I didn’t recognize for years was that this worn out homily also has a profound influence on the one who is catching people doing something right.

Once you start looking for what’s right in the world, it begins to change the way you look at the world around you and actually changes your brain. There is even growing evidence that these changes can be genetically passed on to your children.

March 23, 2017
DFI Blog - What to do Before You File for Divorce (1)

OK, you’ve Decided to Divorce. First, sit with the decision for a few days. Make sure you are not just very hurt and angry. If the decision is clear, a few more days won’t change that. You may have been thinking about this for a long time. I offer that there are things for you to do before you make the big announcement. Don’t declare your intentions yet and don’t file anything yet. In the meanwhile, BE NICE! Do your research before you act.

When you stack cannon balls, how you set the first row determines how the subsequent rows will look. So it is with divorce. What you do at the beginning shapes the course and shape of what is to come.

February 17, 2017
DFI Blog - 10 Tips to a Better Divorce

In announcing his upcoming divorce a great guy I know asked what’s it mean when she said “ I don’t want to be divorced from you. I want to be divorced to you”?

Designer Divorce.  Increasingly people are finding that divorce doesn’t mean the same thing to everyone. It was so much easier when less people we doing it, say in the 1960’s. A divorce meant a lifelong estrangement. We weren’t going to talk, visit, go to the same places to eat, share family holidays and events. Nope, we were divorcing and that was the end of the relationship. Talk through the lawyers and just handle the money issues by mail or notes.

Some people are still using that older version of divorce. There are times when that is a great idea. Not talking can reduce the toxic level of conflict that led to a divorce.

December 28, 2016
Divorce for the 21st Century

I hope you are as excited about our new offering of Divorce, Version 4.0 which offers a free upgrade from 3.0 last revised in 1952. While 3.0 was much better than the older version of leaving the folded up clothes outside of the teepee, the required resources to carry on a lifetime of avoiding each other were too burdensome.

Still, look how far we’ve come since Version 1.0, first launched by Henry the VIII. Most would agree that those beheadings and trials were costly and brutal.

In announcing his upcoming divorce a great guy I know asked what’s it mean when she said “ I don’t want to be divorced from you. I want to be divorced to you”?

September 29, 2016
DFI Blog - Start Softly & Be Gentle - How to Begin a Conversation

Start softly and be gentle. Sounds good, doesn’t it? Cue the Barry White music…on 3, 2, 1…

Just teasing. I am not talking about sex this time. Sorry.

This piece is about how to begin a conversation with someone you love when there is a complaint. First think about what you want to accomplish by bringing up this complaint. It should almost always be that you want something to change, but not at the expense of hurting your partner.

Starting softly sets the tone. Try it the next time you have a complaint. A gentle beginning might sound like, “Hey, Babe, is this a good time to talk? If it is, I would love to have a few minutes with you to work on something.”

July 24, 2016
DFI Blog - 50 Ways to Fail in Private Practice

If you are starting a private practice you probably know there are many ways to fail. Here I give you 50 that occur to me. I am open to hear any additions you might have. PLEASE!!

Of course, I have made a lot of mistakes in my 49 years of practice, the biggest may be telling you how many years I’ve been at this. Some are obvious and some you may not agree with. The idea is get you thinking about how to be successful.

I want you to succeed. My life has been wonderful and a great deal of that is a direct result of my private practice and the flexibility and freedom it has offered me.

Posted in News, Therapists Tips by admin | Tags: ,
July 7, 2016
DFI Blog - Wills & Trusts- Get Over It, You are Going to Die

It is going to happen, so get a will or a trust started now.

Plan now for your and your spouse’s death. If you aren’t married, but are living together as a committed couple, this is even more important. Marrieds have more protections and get more breaks in the law. A will or trust can greatly help unmarrieds.

Too many of us ignore financial or estate planning for death. There aren’t enough of us with wills, especially if we are younger. Plan financially for the death of the other. Discuss how to manage finances, where the money is, who to ask for help with taxes, probate, and insurance. Don’t pretend that you will live forever.

May 20, 2015
DFI Blog - Wills & Trusts- Get Over It You are Going to Die

“Technology is the knack of so arranging the world that we do not experience it” Rollo May, The Cry for Myth

It is 8:00 p.m. My husband and I are settled in on the couch with the TV on. He is searching e-bay for who knows what on his Mac Book and I am scrolling through instagram on my smart phone. We are connected to so many devices and yet, we are obviously not connected to one another in this moment.

This isn’t a new revelation—the idea that technology is causing us to walk around like zombies as we live in a virtual world. We know it…and yet we stay glued to our screens. So what do we do? When is it time to power off? And can we use technology to connect with our partners? Here are some ideas…